Tuesday, November 29, 2005

This Has Got To Be A Joke

I tried belly dancing one time, and I will never do it again.

A friend convinced me that we should give it a try. "How hard could it be?" she questioned. "And what a great tummy exercise." "Yay!" I said. "I'm so excited!"

As soon as we entered the dance studio, I noticed how hot it was. Air conditioning didn't seem to exist in belly dancing classes. The class was filled with close to 30 women, yanking their shirts up to their breasts and tucking them into their bras, eyeing their tummys in the mirror. We all stood in front of the mirror, waiting for our torturer (also known as teacher).

In she walked. I heard her before I saw her. She had long blonde hair and jingled all of the way to the front of the room. I do believe that she said hello, and the next thing I knew, she was putting my body through immense pain.

I'm not a virgin to exercise-I've been dancing my whole life, but belly dancing was something from another planet. Our arms were up for an hour, with no rest. She kept telling me to roll my belly, which I found impossible, so instead I was rolling my back (bad idea). "Oh my God, save me!" I howled to the heavens. "This sucks," my friend said.

We suffered through an hour of abuse, until God decided to hear my prayers. "See you next week!" the torturer barked. My friend and I limped, hunched over to her car. "Well, at least we worked our stomach muscles," I said. "Sure, whatever. Let's go eat Mexican food," my friend answered.

We binged on guacamole, tortilla chips, cheese enchiladas, and rice and beans. We split a Margarita pitcher as well.

The next week my friend called me. "Should we go?" she asked. "Are you kidding?" I answered. "That class is a joke. I'm never setting foot in there again." "Me either," she said. "I was just checking." And belive me, we never did.

Posted by Jaimie :: 5:23 PM :: 14 Peeked Into My Diary:

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