Sunday, October 23, 2005
Men Are Kinda Dumb
I recently bought a fly pair of shoes at an unnamed department store. They were sooooo cute, with a 1940's style twist that I loved. I had tried them on in the store and they fit perfectly.
The next day my boyfriend and I planned to go to lunch and a movie. As soon as I stepped out of the car and started walking, I practically fell over. "What's wrong?" he asked. "It's these shoes! They don't fit!" I clung to his arm and he half carried me through the parking structure. "My heel keeps sliding in and out! I'm going to have to take them back!"
My boyfriend looked alarmed. "How can you take them back? You're already wearing them." Well, " I answered, "I just won't walk. Let's go somewhere where I don't have to walk."
After slowly and carefully walking through the parking structure, to the restaurant, across the street to the bookstore, and back upstairs to the movie theater, I checked the bottom of my shoes. Oh no. They were so scraped, it looked like I had climbed a cliff in heels. "There's no way you're going to get away with that," he said. "We'll see about that!" I answered indignantly.
2 hours later we were back in the department store. I stopped by the lingerie department and picked up a lilac pajama set. I had put the very worn shoes back into the original shoe box and headed straight for the shoe department. Behind the counter was a very mean looking woman. There was a long line of customers, and she looked rather annoyed that she was working on a Saturday night. "Come on," I said. "Let's go to housewares."
In the housewares department there was a very thin, delicate man standing behind the counter who looked bored to death. I turned around to tell my boyfriend that I had found our cashier, but he had disappeared. I didn't care-I was returning these shoes!
"Hi," I said to the cashier, with a huge innocent smile. He stifled a yawn. "Yeah?" "Um, hi. I need to return these shoes because-" He took the box and threw on the counter behind them. I looked at the box. It looked rather lonely and forgotten, and suddenly I felt guilty. "Okay, um," I continued, "I'm returning the shoes, and getting this." I placed the pajama set on the counter. "Yeah, okay." He answered.
The lovely, bored man never even opened the shoe box. I could have had a large variety of different colored rocks in the box and he would have never known. I actually went to the extreme of cleaning the bottom of the shoes and even considered painting the bottoms with brown nail polish, until my boyfriend stopped me.
Some men are kind of dumb. Especially men who work in housewares and have female customers return shoes in their department. And, what made the experience even better, is that he only charged me for the camisole of the pajama set.
Shopping, and returning, is always fun.
Posted by Jaimie ::
3:13 PM ::
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